| Category | Quote | E-Mail this quote | | doggerel | Don't lose your head / To gain a minute / You need your head / Your brains are in it
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| Haste | Don't lose your head / To gain a minute / You need your head / Your brains are in it
| |
| Humor | Our last: /
Farewell O verse /
Along the road /
How sad to see /
You're out of mode
| |
| Humor | The salesman /
Taught the /
Farmer's daughter /
To plant her tu-lips /
Where she otter
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| Humor | If you must test /
Her pucker paint /
Be sure to drive /
Where traffic ain't
| |
| Humor | A man who passes /
On hills and curves /
Is not a /
Man of iron nerves /
He's crazy!
| |
| Humor | Famous words /
About lights that shine /
If he won't dim his /
I won't dim mine /
| |
| Humor | Don't take /
A curve at /
Sixty per /
We hate to lose /
A customer
| |
| Humor | If hugging on highways /
Is your sport /
Trade in your car /
For a davenport
| |
| Humor | Car in ditch /
Man in tree /
Moon was full /
So was he!
| |
| Humor | Snake rail fences /
And old log houses /
Both were built /
To keep out /
Cowses
| |
| Humor | You can drive /
A mile a minute /
But there is no /
Future in it
| |
| Humor | They missed the turn /
The car went whizzin' /
The fault was hern /
The funeral hisn
| |
| Humor | Angels who guard you /
When you drive /
Usually retire /
At sixty-five
| |
| Humor | The car went whizzin'
A nut at the wheel /
A peach on his right /
A curve in the road /
Fruit salad that night
| |
| Humor | Dim your lights /
Behind a car /
Let folks see /
How bright you are
| |
| Humor | If you don't know /
Whose signs these are /
You haven't driven /
Very far!
| |
| Humor | Round the curve /
Lickety-split /
Beautiful car /
Wasn't it?
| |
| Humor | Thirty days /
Hath September /
April, June, /
And the Speed Offender
| |
| Humor | A Man, A Miss /
A Car, A Curve /
He kissed the Miss /
And missed the Curve
| |
| Humor | Listen birds /
These signs cost money /
You can rest awhile /
But don't get Funny
| |
| Humor | Don't stick your elbow /
Out too far /
Or it may /
Go home /
In another car!
| |
| Humor | The one who /
Drives when /
He's been drinking /
Depends on you /
To do his thinking
| |
| Humor | The midnight /
Ride of Paul /
For beer /
Led to a warmer /
Hemishpere
| |
| Humor | He lit a match /
To check gas tank /
That's why /
They call him /
Skinless frank
| |
| Humor | If daisies /
Are your /
Favorite flower /
Keep pushin' up those /
Miles-per-hour
| |
| Humor | Many a forest /
Used to stand /
Where a /
Lighted match /
Got out of hand
| |
| Humor | Don't leave safety /
To mere chance /
That's why /
Belts are /
Sold with pants
| |
| Humor | Don't /
Try passing /
On a slope /
Unless you have /
A periscope
| |
| Humor | Passing cars /
When you can't see /
May get you /
A glimpse /
Of eternity
| |
| Humor | Said farmer Brown /
Who's bald /
On top /
Wish I could /
Rotate the crop
| |
| Humor | Drinking drivers-- /
Nothing worse /
They put /
The quart /
Before the hearse
| |
| Humor | Does your husband /
Misbehave /
Grunt and grumble /
Rant and rave? /
Shoot the brute some
| |
| Humor | Take /
Your /
Time /
Not /
Your life
| |
| Humor | Cattle crossing /
Means go slow /
That old bull /
Is some /
Cow's beau
| |
| Humor | The blackened forest /
Smoulders yet /
Because /
He flipped /
A cigarette
| |
| Humor | The blackened forest /
Smoulders yet /
Because /
He flipped /
A cigarette
| |
| Humor | These signs /
Are not /
For laughs alone /
The face they save /
May be your own
| |
| Humor | The safest rule /
No ifs or buts /
Just drive /
Like every one else /
Is nuts!
| |
| Humor | Around /
The curve /
Lickety-split /
It's a beautiful car /
Wasn't it?
| |
| Humor | No matter /
The price /
No matter how new /
The best safety device /
In your car is you
| |
| Humor | It gave /
McDonald /
That needed charm /
Hello Hollywood /
Good-by farm
| |
| Humor | Why is it /
When you /
Try to pass /
The guy in front /
Goes twice as fast?
| |
| Humor | His rose /
Is wed /
His violet blew /
But his sugar is sweet /
Since he took this cue
| |
| Humor | Better try /
Less speed per mile /
That car /
May have to /
Last a while
| |
| Humor | Is he /
Lonesome /
Or just blind-- /
This guy who drives /
So close behind?
| |
| Humor | Heaven's /
Latest /
Neophyte /
Signalled left /
Then turned right
| |
| Humor | Drinking drivers /
Don't you know /
Great bangs /
From little /
Binges grow?
| |
| Humor | Substitutes /
Can do /
More harm /
Than city fellers /
On a farm
| |
| Humor | Proper /
Distance /
To him was bunk /
They pulled him out /
Of some guy's trunk
| |
| Humor | The band /
For which /
The grand stand roots /
Is not made up of /
Substi-toots!
| |
| Humor | Spring /
Has sprung /
The grass has riz /
Where last year's /
Careless drivers is
| |
| Humor | Cautious rider /
To her /
Reckless dear /
Let's have less bull /
And lots more steer
| |
| Humor | Altho insured /
Remember, kiddo /
They don't pay you /
They pay /
Your widow
| |
| Humor | Train approaching /
Whistle squealing /
Pause! /
Avoid that /
Rundown feeling!
| |
| Humor | Train wrecks few
Reason clear /
Fireman /
Never hugs /
Engineer
| |
| Humor | He tried /
To cross /
As fast train neared /
Death didn't draft him /
He volunteered
| |
| Humor | Her chariot /
Raced 80 per /
They hauled away /
What had /
Ben Her
| |
| Humor | Violets are blue /
Roses are pink /
On graves /
Of those /
Who drive and drink
| |
| Humor | A guy /
Who drives /
A car wide open /
Is not thinkin' /
He's just hopin'
| |
| Humor | Twinkle, twinkle /
One-eyed car /
We all wonder /
WHERE you are
| |
| Humor | The place to pass /
On curves /
You know /
Is only at /
A beauty show
| |
| Humor | On curves ahead /
Remember, sonny /
That rabbit's foot /
Didn't save /
The bunny
| |
| Humor | The place to pass
On curves
You know
Is only at
A beauty show
| |
| Silly | Listen birds / These signs cost money / So roost awhile / But don't get funny
| |
