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| Author | Quote | E-Mail this quote |
|---|---|---|
| Ronald Reagan | "It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession. I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first." | |
| Adlai Stevenson (1900 - 1965) | In America any boy may become President and I suppose it's just one of the risks he takes. | |
| Adlai Stevenson | I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends - that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them. | |
| Aesop | We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office. | |
| Aleon Devore | They're as poorly written as cell-phone instructions. - (newsman, re ballot amendments) | |
| Ambrose Bierce | Politics, n. strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. | |
| Andy Rooney | I polled my associates to see if they are as liberal as people think, but this year they were almost equally split: half favored Kerry, and half hated Bush. | |
| Anonymous | After all is said and done, more is said than done. | |
| Anonymous | In 2004 we didn't have a real election; it was just station identification. | |
| Anonymous | The last time we mixed politics with religion, people got burned at the stake. | |
| Anonymous | Dan Quayle and George W. Bush: the worst jackasses that ever disgraced the American political scene. | |
| Anonymous | Reporter, to candidate: Do you think you can get Republicans and Democrats to work together? Candidate: I'm running for Governor, not God. | |
| Aristophanes (450 BC - 385 BC) | Under every stone lurks a politician. | |
| Barack Obama (1961 - ) | You don't need to boo, you just need to vote. - ((after making and anti-McCain comment)) | |
| Barack Obama (1961 - ) | I don't disagree with John McCain on everything; I respect his occasional displays of civility. | |
| Barack Obama (1961 - ) | After Iraq, then Afghanistan. | |
| Barack Obama (1961 - ) | I'm not going to tell you this plan is perfect … it was produced in Washington … | |
| Barrack Hussein Obama | "If you can rob Peter to pay Pablo, Maria, Deshawn and Shawnika you will always have the support of Pablo, Maria, Deshawn and Shawnika." | |
| Bob Edwards | Now I know what a statesman is; he's a dead politician. We need more statesmen. | |
| Capt. Charlie Roberts (1938 - ) | Pie in the Sky Doesn't Satisfy | |
| Charles De Gaulle (1890 - 1970) | I have come to the conclusion that politics are too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. | |
| Charles de Gaulle (1890 - 1970) | I respect those who resist me, but I cannot tolerate them. | |
| Chef Gar Fillet (1942 - ) | When the final chapter is written on Lubbock, Texas it will likely be Chapter Thirteen. - (Somethin' is always cookin' in Lubbock) | |
| Clarence Darrow (1857 - 1938) | When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. Now I'm beginning to believe it. | |
| Dan Quayle (1947 - ) | I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people. | |
| Dan Quayle (1947 - ) | I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican. | |
| Dan Quayle (1947 - ) | Murphy Brown is doing better than I am. At least she knows she still has a job next year. | |
| David Broder | Anybody who wants the presidency so much that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office. | |
| Deng Xiaoping (1904 - 1997) | Yellow Cat, Black Cat, As Long as it Catches Mice, It's a Good Cat. - (Leader of China) | |
| Dennis Miller | We need anything politically important rationed out like PEZ: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head. | |
| Dick Gregory (1932 - ) | Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten. | |
| Dr. Samuel Johnson (1707 - 1784) | He that changes his party by his humour is not more virtuous than he that changes it by his interest; he loves himself rather than truth. | |
| Edward Abbey (1927 - 1989) | The tragedy of modern war is that the young men die fighting each other -- instead of their real enemies back home in the capitals. | |
| Ernest Benn | Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. | |
| Eugene McCarthy (1916 - ) | It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember. | |
| Eugene McCarthy (1916 - ) | Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. | |
| G. Gordon Liddy | A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money. | |
| G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936) | And they that rule in england /n In stately conclave met, n Alas, alas for England /n They have no graves as yet. | |
| George Jean Nathan | Politics is the diversion of trivial men who, when they succeed at it, become important in the eyes of more trivial men. | |
| Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977) | Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies. | |
| H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956) | In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for, as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican | |
| H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956) | It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office. | |
| Harold Macmillan | After a long life, I have come to the conclusion that when all the establishment is united, it is always wrong | |
| Henry Kissinger (1923 - ) | Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation. | |
| Hillaire Belloc | The standard of intellect in politics is so low that men of moderate mental capacity have to stoop in order to reach it. | |
| Ibsen | One should never put on one's best trousers to go out to batle for freedom and truth. | |
| James Reston | All politics are based on the indifference of the majority. | |
| Jay Leno | Now see, a lot of critics are saying Arnold can't get elected because he's just an ambitious guy with a famous name, who doesn't know anything about running the government. Didn't hurt George Bush. | |
| Jay Leno (1950 - ) | The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow "Operation Re-elect Bush" doesn't seem to be popular. | |
| Jay Leno (1950 - ) | In an effort to make the Bush environmental record look good, former Interior secretary Gail Norton announced that under the Bush administration there are now more wetlands than at any time since 1954. Well, yeah, if you count New Orleans. | |
| Jay Leno (1950 - ) | Did you hear about the big collision that happened today? Yeah, a bunch of Republicans running away from Bush ran into a bunch of Democrats running away from Kerry. | |
| Jay Leno (1950 - ) | Jay Leno (interviewing a "presidential candidate"): If you are elected, what do you plan to do about the Shiites? Candidate: Immodium! | |
| Jay Leno (1950 - ) | Nancy Pelosi is the Speaker of the House, second in the line of successors to George W. Bush, just a heartbeat away from a man who barely has a heartbeat. | |
| Jay Leno (1950 - ) | Senator John Kerry announced today that he would not run for President in 2007; it just isn't the right time. Why isn't it the right time? It's an election year. | |
| Jeff Foxworthy | If you can't say something nice about someone....you must be talking about Hillary Clinton. (Jeff Foxworthy) - (Blue Collar Comedy Tour) | |
| Jerry Falwell (1933 - 2007) | I think, as a nation, we've got to be more closed minded. | |
| Jerry Falwell (1933 - 2007) | The idea that religion and politics don't mix was invented by the Devil to keep Christians from running their own country. - (Evangelist) | |
| Jimmy Carter (1924 - ) | The most telltale distinction between Republicans and Democrats is their preference between ways of resolving international issues -- reliance on force, or diplomacy. | |
| John Adams (1735 - 1826) | In politics the middle way is none at all. | |
| John Adams (1735 - 1826) | The proposition that the people are the best keepers of their own liberties is not true. They are the worst conceivable, they are no keepers at all; they can neither judge, act, think, or will, as a political body. - (2nd U.S. President) | |
| John F. Kennedy (1917 - 1963) | There is no city in the United States in which I get a warmer welcome and fewer votes than Columbus, Ohio. | |
| John Kenneth Galbraith | Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatalbe. | |
| John Kenneth Galbraith | Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. | |
| John Nance Garner (1868 - 1967) | The vice-presidency isn't worth a pitcher of warm piss - (Vice-President of the United States) | |
| John Randolph | He is a man of splendid abilities, but utterly corrupt. Like rotten mackeral by moonlight, he shines and stinks. - (late 18th-early 19th Century American Politician and Philosopher) | |
| Joseph Stalin | Those who cast the votes decide nothing. Those who count the votes decide everything. | |
| Kin Hubbard | Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature. | |
| Larry Hardiman | The word politics is derived from the word poly, meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'. | |
| Lester B. Pearson | Politics is the skilled use of blunt objects. | |
| Lily Tomlin (1939 - ) | Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard working, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them. - (comedienne, actress) | |
| Mark B. Cohen | Nothing can so alienate a voter from the political system as backing a winning candidate. | |
| Mark Hanna | There are two things that are important in politics. The first is money, and I can't remember what the second one is. | |
| Muhammad Ali | No Vietcong ever called me a nigger. - (in 1966) | |
| Oscar Levant (1906 - 1972) | The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too. | |
| Pat Paulsen | Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles. | |
| Patrick Leahy | You get fifteen democrats in a room, and you get twenty opinions. | |
| Paul Valery | Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them. | |
| Pericles (495 BCE - 429 BCE) | Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you. | |
| Peter Lucht (1/8/53 - ) | Falling in the sanctimonious smugness of complete control is a sure sign of senility. - (Poet) | |
| Pissonya (1964 - ) | The Primary pupose of a mediocer mind is to stifle that of greatness. | |
| Plato | One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. | |
| Ralph Waldo emerson (1803 - 1882) | Every reform is only a mask under cover of which a more terrible reform, which dares not yet name itself, approaches. | |
| Richard M. Nixon (1913 - 1994) | I would have made a good Pope. | |
| Robert Louis Stevenson | Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary. | |
| Robert S. Strauss | You can fool some of the people all of the time, and those are the ones you have to concentrate on. | |
| Robin Williams (1951 - ) | Politics: "Poli" a Latin word meaning "many," and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures." | |
| Ronald Reagan (1911 - ) | Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first. | |
| Ronald Reagan (1911 - ) | I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. | |
| Ronald Reagan (1911 - ) | Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. | |
| Sir Bertrand Russell | Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Education
Men are born ignorant, not stupid; they are make stupid by education.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
-
Bertrand Russell
Bible
So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Reason
It has been said that man is a rational animal. All my life I have been searching for evidence which could support this.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Fathers
The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Fanatics
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Men
Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occured to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Knowledge
There is much pleasure to be gained from useless knowledge.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Partiotism
Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Movements
All movements go too far.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Beliefs
I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Happiness
Few people can be happy unless they hate some other person, nation or creed.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Life
Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim.
- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Bertrand Russell
Morality
The infliction of cruelty with a good conscience is the delight of moralists -- that is why they invented hell.
- Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell
Honesty
Our great democracies still tend to think that a stupid man is more likely to be honest than a clever man.
- Bertrand Russell
- (Philospher and Philanthropist) | |
| Solomon Short | The difference between politics and chemistry? Nobody fools around in a chem lab. | |
| Solomon Short | A politician's success is measured by his ability to get elected. If he's good at that, he doesn't have to be good at anything else. | |
| Solomon Short | What neither political party has ever learned is the most basic of all lessons: When you make someone else's character the issue, your own character becomes the issue too. - ((aka David Gerrold)) | |
| Stephen Millich (1941 - ) | I have too much compassion to be a conservative and too much sense to be a liberal. | |
| Stephen Millich (1941 - ) | Libertarian: Someone who believes people should take care of themselves, especially when they can't. | |
| Stephen Millich (1941 - ) | It's amazing how people enter politics to help and end up helping themselves. | |
| Stephen Millich (1941 - ) | The problem with liberals is that they have never eaten with their own teeth. | |
| Stephen Millich (1941 - ) | Democrats are people who will give the shirt off your back | |
| Stephen Millich (1941 - ) | Democrats are people who will give another the shirt off your back. | |
| Tacitus | The more corrupt the republic, the more numerous the laws. | |
| Theodore Roosevelt (1858 - 1919) | To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public. | |
| Thomas Jefferson (1743 - 1826) | No man will ever bring out of the Presidency the reputation which carries him into it. | |
| Thomas Sowell | When you start off by telling those who disagree with you that they are not merely in error but in sin, how much of a dialog do you expect? | |
| Tobias Smollett | I think for my part one half of the nation is mad- and the other not very sound. | |
| V.P. Dick Cheney (1941 - ) | So? - (when told of anti-war opinion polls) | |
| Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) | Politics is applesauce. | |
| Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) | The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other. | |
| Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) | Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate; now what's going to happen to us with both a Senate and a House? | |
| William Blake (1757 - 1827) | The strongest poison ever known Came from Caesar's laurel crowne. | |
| William C. Westmoreland (1914 - 2005) | The military don't start wars. The politicians start wars.
- (Army General) | |
| Woody Allen | The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5'7", it is impossible to get your congressman on the phone. |
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